Invasion of privacy?

[Rudyjohn]

Do any of you parents read notes found in your kids' room? Would you consider that an invasion of privacy?

(My mother read everything she could possibly get her hands on in my room but she was crazy, so I can't go by that.)

 

[Jdarg]

Hmmm. I'm gonna let the moms with older teens weigh in on this one before I say anything. I hope you get a few responses because I thought about this the other day.

 

[Allifunn]

I would never read a note written to one of my kids...come on ...some things are meant to be private...if you are having problems with said child...that is a whole other matter...but if it is a good child and a secure child...then reading their notes is a total invasion of privacy!!!!

 

[Rudyjohn]

I would never read a note written to one of my kids...come on ...some things are meant to be private...if you are having problems with said child...that is a whole other matter...but if it is a good child and a secure child...then reading their notes is a total invasion of privacy!!!!

Well, I'm not saying I would open up a sealed letter or pry open a diary. I'm talking about notes laying around in plain view - not hidden. Notes from a girlfriend.

Also, said child IS a good kid & fairly secure. AND a trustworthy kid - no past problems in the least. But there's the peer pressure...

Believe me, I know some things are meant to be private. That's the problem.

 

[Ocean Lover]

Good question JR, I'd like to hear what others have to say also. Sam asked for a myspace last spring. I agreed providing I would check it at anytime and cancel the account at anytime if I found anything inappropriate. Her account is private. Some "friends" have been deleted but she still has an account. She doesn't care if I check it but it does feel a little strange and it might be time to let it be. I have a myspace so I can keep an eye on it from a "friend" prospective. I have a few friends that are very anti-myspace. I do see the dangers if it isn't monitored in some way. Sam is good at not adding friends of friends and she doesn't add anyone she doesn't know personally. It's been a good way to communicate with her friends.

 

[LightWorker]

Well, I'm not saying I would open up a sealed letter or pry open a diary. I'm talking about notes laying around in plain view - not hidden. Notes from a girlfriend.

Also, said child IS a good kid & fairly secure. AND a trustworthy kid - no past problems in the least. But there's the peer pressure...

Believe me, I know some things are meant to be private. That's the problem.

How old is your child?

 

[Allifunn]

I normally do not totally express my opinions here...I love peace and love...but this subject hits home with me...it is a matter of self esteem and trust.....if you do not trust your child enough to do the right thing and you have to read their personal notes...then you are wrong...you teach them the good ways in life and you HAVE to trust that you have done your best...to read their personal notes (even if they are in plain sight) is an invasion of personal privacy

 

[Minnie]

Very hard question. All I can advise is if you do it, be prepared to explain why and have that decided before you go forward with the reading.

Because you have to realize that if you read it and you find out something you are not pleased with, are you keeping that to yourself, or confronting your child.

If you plan to read, you better be prepared to confront if necessary.

 

[Rudyjohn]

Thank you.

I believe I have hit some nerves here and I'm sorry. I've deleted whatever posts I was able to.

This has not been a good day. But hey, no one said being a parent would be easy.

Thanks again for everyone's help and opinions. They are appreciated.


Later.

 

[Bob]

I would never read my daughter's notes, unless there was a very compelling reason. So what happened? Bad influence from your kid's friend weighing on you?